Murphy's Laws E

E

Law of economic dispersion
The one you want is never the one on sale. If you like it, they don't have it in your size. You never
want the one you can afford.

Economists' Laws
1.What men learn from history is that men do not learn from history.
2.If on an actuarial basis there is a 50-50 chance that something will go wrong, it will actually go wrong
nine times out of ten.

Ed Yourdonradar's Fundamental Truth
The grass is brown on both sides of the fence.

Ed's Fifth Rule of Procrastination
Spend sufficient time confirming the need and the need will disappear.

Edds Law of Radiology
The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body you are required to place on it.

Edington's Theory
The number of different hypotheses erected to explain a given biological phenomenon is inversely
proportional to the available knowledge.

Law of Editorial Correction
Anyone nit-picking enough to write a letter of correction to an editor doubtless deserves the error
that provoked it.

Ehre's Double-Door Law
In approaching a double door, you will always go to the one door that is locked, pull when you should
have pushed, and push when the sign says pull.

Ehrlich's Rule
The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.

Ehrman's Commentary
Things will get worse before they will get better. Who said things would get better?

Ehrman's Commentary on Ginberg's Theorem
1.Things will get worse before they get better.
2.Who said things would get better?

Electronic theorem of television sets
A $300 picture tube will protect a 10½ fuse by blowing first

Elena's Laws of Animal Behavior
The probability of a cat eating it's dinner has absolutely nothing to do with the price of the food
placed before it.

Eliot's Observation
Nothing is so good as it seems beforehand.

Ellenberg's Theory
One good turn gets most of the blanket.

Emerson's Insight
That which we call sin in others is experiment for us.

Eng's Principles
The easier it is to do, the harder it is to change.

The "Enough Already" Law
The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.

Law of Entropy
If you put a spoonful of wine in a barrel full of sewage you get sewage. If you put a spoonful of
sewage into a barrel full of wine you still get sewage.

Epstein's Law
If you think the problem is bad now, just wait until we've solved it.

Erhard's Contention
Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Erskines Observation on Government Procurement
An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.

Etorre's Observation
The other line moves faster.
Corollary - Don't try to change lines. The other line -- the one you were in originally -- will then move
faster.

Ettorre's Observation
The other line moves faster.

Evans's Law
Nothing worth a damn is ever done as a matter of principle. (If it is worth doing, it is done because it
is worth doing. If it is not, it's done as a matter of principle.)

Evans's Law of Politics
When team members are finally in a position to help the team, it turns out they have quit the team.

Eve's Discovery
At a bargain sale, the only suit or dress that you like best and that fits is the one not on sale.
Adam's Corollary - It's easy to tell when you've got a bargain -- it doesn't fit.

Evelyn's Rules for Bureaucratic Survival
1.A bureaucrat's castle is his desk... and parking place. Proceed cautiously when changing either.
2.On the theory that one should never take anything for granted, follow up on everything, but especially
those items varying from the norm. The greater the divergence from normal routine and/or the
greater the number of offices potentially involved, the better the chance a never-to-be-discovered
person will file the problem away in a drawer specifically designed for items requiring a decision.
3.Never say without qualification that your activity has sufficient space, money, staff, etc.
4.Always distrust offices not under your jurisdiction which say that they are there to serve you.
"Support" offices in a bureaucracy tend to grow in size and make demands on you out of proportion
to their service, and in the end require more effort on your part than their service is worth.
Corollary - Support organizations can always prove success by showing service to someone... not
necessarily you.
5.Incompetents often hire able assistants.

Everitt's Form of the Second Law of Thermodynamics
Confusion (entropy) is always increasing in society. Only if someone or something works extremely
hard can this confusion be reduced to order in a limited region. Nevertheless, this effort will stil result
in an increase in the total confusion of society at large.

Evvie Nef's Law
There is a solution to every problem; the only difficulty is finding it.

Experiential Law
Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment.

First Law of Expert Advice
Don't ask the barber whether you need a haircut.

Extended Epstein-Heisenberg Principle
In an R & D orbit, only 2 of the existing 3 parameters can be defined simultaneously. The
parameters are: task, time, and resources ($).
1.If one knows what the task is, and there is a time limit allowed for the completion of the task,
then one cannot guess how much it will cost.
2.If the time and resources ($) are clearly defined, then it is impossible to know what part of the
R & D task will be performed.
3.If you are given a clearly defined R & D goal and a definte amount of money which has been
calculated to be necessary for the completion of the task, one cannot predict if and when the
goal will be reached.
4.If one is lucky enough to be able to accurately define all three parameters, then what one is
dealing with is not in the realm of R & D.

Extended Murphy's Law
If a series of events can go wrong, it will do so in the worst possible sequence.